Sometimes in life you come across shitty people.
Really. Fucking. Shitty. Horrible. Toxic. People.
They influence you in all the wrong ways.
The introduce you to crappy ways of thinking.
They consume your time and energy.
They never help and only take.
They corrupt you!
Then one day you ask for help. An ear. Even a simple hello.
And you get nothing.
They tell you to fuck off.
Unfortunately, they do exist.
For a while.
It might even break you for a period, if other parts of your life are also in turmoil.
You might swear. Act up. Cry.
They can cause all sorts of terror for you.
Then some day – or maybe progressively – a switch changes and start to you feel better.
Time passes and the good feeling becomes normal again.
You say “fuck them and their asshole ways”. You take charge of yourself, get your shit together, and make something great.
Or maybe you just make small improvements. That’s OK. Anything better is good – big or small.
But you take charge and get life your back on track again.
And, you swear
Never. Ever. Again. Will you allow some fucker to push you to walk the dark path.
If you’re going through this now, you must think as I once did: “Fuck off with your optimistic bullshit. My life is shit.”
Give it time. It could take a year. Sorry, but that might be what you’re looking at.
Find just one small thing that’s good – something you want or a dream you have – and chase it.
Work with your darkness and grief.
Don’t try to force it away because that doesn’t work (I know).
Listen to it. Consider it. Try to control it – even a small amount of control is victory!
Take inspiration from it if you can. You can find wonder in the darkness.
Because some day, when you’re ready, it will start to fade.
Then, eventually, it will be gone.
But only when you are ready.
That’s what you have to focus on.
Then life continues.
Life, regardless of our own desire, always continues.
Hopefully you’re a happy part of it.
And if you’re not happy and need someone to talk to, start with firstname.lastname@example.org – I’m always here to listen.